Bitter
by aradia153
Summary: After a messy divorce from Ginny, and being forced into single parenthood, Harry has become bitter and detached. will he ever be able to accept another person into his life again? hp/dm
1. Prologue

Authors note: Hi everyone. This is slightly AU, Harry and Ginny only had one son. Hope you enjoy, and reviews would be wonderful. Flames will be used to make Damper while I sing the Australian national anthem to the tune of Working class man

It has been two years.

Twenty four months.

One hundred and four weeks.

Seven hundred and thirty full days.

That's how long it had been since his divorce. Since Ginny had run off with Dean Thomas, and left him to raise James on his own.

He should have known. All the signs had been there. But he had ignored them, had pretended that everything was fine. But then reality came and bit him on the arse. He came home from work one day to find Ginny in bed with that rat Dean.

She had blamed him of course. Told him she had no choice to find other company when he started working double shifts at St Mungos.

"I'm lonely" she had said while she had gotten dressed. "You're never home. You've forgotten us. You don't need to work so much. We have more money then we need. You work to escape us"

Nothing could have been further from the truth. He worked because he felt he needed to. He needed the redemption. He had caused the deaths of so many during the war. He felt the only way he could ever make up for it was to spend the rest of his life saving others.

Ginny would have none of it though. She wouldn't believe him. She had screamed and yelled, thrown things at his head. Then she had walked out.

The divorce had been ugly. Harry was grateful that James had been to young to remember it. The fights were legendary. The media had a field day with the whole ordeal. it had taken six months of pure hell to finalise the divorce papers. When it was all over Ginny had taken half of his fortune and had dumped one year old James on him, saying that she didn't want the burden of his child to stop her in her new life with Dean, whom she had married just 10 months after they had split.

Life had been arduous since then. James had gotten sick last year and, as a result, had lost his hearing. Harry had tried everything, had researched every spell in the book, to make him better, but nothing had worked. Harry had to go to night school on top of working to learn sign language so he could communicate with his son.

Harry felt that he was lucky to have Ron and Hermione there to support him through the hard times. Despite Ginny being his sister, Ron had stuck by him, has always been there to pick him up off the floor when he had too much to drink. He had scolded Harry when he had found the marijuana and the pipe under the kitchen sink. He was always encouraging, never judgemental, and always knew the right words to say.

"Harry", he would say, "you need to be strong for James. How can you do that when you're passed out? How will drugs help you to raise him properly?"

Ron was right.

So Harry had thrown out the fire whiskey bottles and the drugs, cleaned himself up and had gone back to work.

Now things were getting better. Harry had been promoted to Attending physician, James was now 3, and learning sign language at lightning speed, and was also showing signs of a strong magical aura. Harry had a wonderful group of friends and Hermione and Ron were only a month off having their first child.

There were still hard times, still problems to solve, the biggest being Harry's heart, or lack of one, according to his friends.

He was cold towards any female who tried to show any interest, and would refuse to go out for social events, always finding some excuse to back out at the last minute. He frowned at anything even remotely romantic, would avoid certain places and shops, and would turn the radio off when a love song played.

Harry had become bitter towards love.


	2. Chapter 1

Authors note: ok guys so here's the update. Oh and I forgot the **disclaimer** in my first chapter so...I own nothing. Oh and this is a slash fic. Male male lovey stuff.

"You know, Lavender is hosting a little get together this Saturday. She said she'd love to have you there." Ron told Harry over their weekly Tuesday night dinner.

"Yes that's right. It should be a lot of fun Harry," Hermione called from the lounge room, where she was resting. Pregnancy was wearing her out and the only position that was comfortable for her was reclining on the couch.

Harry's brow furrowed, and his lips set in a thin line. "I'm not interested in going, besides, Lavender was always closer to Ginny then me. I haven't spoken to her for a long time."

Hermione sighed. "Come on Harry, it's been so long since you have gone out and seen everyone. Luna and Neville will be there, and she's been dying to show you the engagement ring Neville gave her."

Harry shook his head. "I'm not really up for it. I'm working anyway. Maybe next time." He started clearing the table, eager to busy his hands.

"That's what you said last time Harry, after we invited you to the baby shower. You should have heard everybody talking when you didn't show up. They think your becoming a recluse. That you have some sort of people phobia," Ron piped up.

Harry saw red. "People phobia!!" he yelled. "What a stupid notion, I work at a hospital for Merlins sake. I'm around people every day, I save their lives!!"

Ron lifted his hands in surrender, "Hey, don't yell at me mate. I'm just repeating the rumours. And you have to be honest with yourself Harry, they have cause to believe them. There've been countless of social events that you have missed. It's been almost 18 months since anyone aside from us has set eyes on you."

Harry huffed and dropped down onto a chair. He ran his fingers through his thick black hair, and closed his eyes. "I don't feel comfortable being out in public at this point. I've seen they way people look at me. The sympathy in their eyes kills me. I don't want to be pitied."

"And the women," Harry shook his head. "They drive me mad. They think because I'm now single that I'm interested in dating again. I'm not, not in the least. I'd rather face a thousand angry dragons then let myself be dragged down by another woman"

"Not all women are like Ginny," Hermione said, getting up off the couch and walking over to him. "Do you honestly think that I would ever do anything like that to Ron?"

Harry shook his head. "I know you wouldn't. And I know that not all women are like Ginny, but I'm not willing to take another chance. Having my heart broken once is more than enough for me. I'm content being on my own."

Hermione took Harry's hand in hers. "Content, Harry. But not happy."

"My son makes me happy." Harry said stubbornly. "I don't want to discuss this anymore. I'm not going, and that's my final decision." He pulled his hand out of Hermione's grasp and continued to clear the table.

Ron saw the tears brewing in his wife's eyes, and slung his arm across her shoulders. "We better head off," he said softly. "The offer is still there Harry. Just fire call us if you change your mind. We'll be there too, so you won't have to go alone." They turned to the fire place, and flooed back home.

Harry finished cleaning as if he were in a trance. Conflicting emotions were running through his head and heart. He honestly didn't want to go, but seeing the pain his best friends were suffering by his hands was getting too much to handle.

After countless hours of hard thinking Harry made the decision to show up at the party, if only to appease his companions. He wouldn't have to stay long, just long enough to quash any theories of him becoming a hermit.

He sighed deeply, hoping he wouldn't have cause to regret this decision.


End file.
